Izzy. What a kid. Three and a half is a very difficult age, but it's also a blast. There's so much going on inside that little head that I really think he just can't help but act like a nutzoid sometimes. The last few days have been very challenging with him.
For instance, as he was breaking his crayons in half yesterday, he'd snarl his face up at me and say, "Oh yeah? How 'bout THAT?," in a very wicked tone, one that struck that instant fury chord in me. He was just being a jerk, plain and simple, and we don't have any idea where he's heard anyone say something like before.
Tonight, he kept turning the dial on his light all the way up when Chris was trying to get him to go to bed. We leave the light on very, very dim until we go to bed and then flip it off. But tonight he wouldn't stop, so Chris unscrewed the round knob off it's little tiny screw. It wasn't ten seconds before Izzy had it back on and turned up all the way again.
He's always been pretty good with fine dexterity. Well, to a point that is. He does his buttons quite well now, but I CAN NOT get him to write a single letter. Actually, I can't get him to sit still long enough to watch me write a single "A," so I'm not too surprised he hasn't picked it up.
That's one of the things I think about when I'm trying to decide whether to find another preschool for him. He really wants some friends, and he's breaking my heart telling me that he's going to tell his friends, "Batman," "Spiderman," or the "butter" *sigh* on me. I wouldn't care to be tattled on, but not to a dairy product at least!
But I still don't think he's really ready for preschool. His behavior ranges from far better to far worse from where he was when he started the last one in September. Sometimes he's a really wonderful little guy to be around. But yesterday Chris and I were both in Izzy's room trying to reason with him as I sat in the floor picking up some of his toys, when I said, "If this is how he acted [in preschool] then I don't blame them for kicking him out." Seriously. I still think they went about it all wrong, but I can understand not wanting him there anymore if he acted out like he was yesterday. If his dad and I get so irritated with him that our heads nearly explode, imagine what he can do to people who don't know him, much less love him?
There's also a big part of me that can't stand to see our hearts broken again. Mine, Chris's, or Izzy's. Preschool was an awful experience for all of us. So I'm not sure I want to walk down that path again so soon. I need to look into other programs, but as of now I'm not aware of any in this area.
This is one of those very few times that I wish I had a nice boring little kid. One that I could just send off to preschool without a thought in the world. I hate having to worry about it like this. I also hate thinking that parents with quiet, well-behaved children think that their kids are like that due to their great parenting, and that Izzy is so wild due to my poor parenting. Although I would be more than happy to accept credit for his sweet, gentle, giving nature. :-)
This morning he woke up, stretched real big, looked over at me and smiled and said, "So what do you want for Christmas?" If he could control those wild impulses to make me happy, I know he would. I know that one day, he will.
Until then, cross your fingers for me.
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